Archive for July, 2003

what i mean to say..

July 25, 2003

my saturated soul feels like wet leather on a winter day
forming a frozen crusty shell trapping me in this hellish
tantrum of self creating negativity i yearn to be free
only when i see that you love me do i remember i am free
are you sad to see me weak down on one knee
do you require more of me for i am all that you see
all of me in and outside of me i am strong when i need to be
but deep in side of me i cry out of fright everything that happens
around me is scaring me.

am i older than i was yesterday it slipped away from me like every other day
inside of me i feel the same yet outside me is changing steadily
i’ll grow old gracifully no need to work on me
even the worst of me is still part of all you see
when i look at you i feel my shell softening your healing me
am i greedy possibly needy to be so deeply connected to your being
or is the feeling i’m understanding merely the shifting deep in me
love sets us free transforming me together we can
be that which we are meant

everyday is testing me pushing me my mind plays tricks on me
constantly doubting everything questioning this is part of me
crazy to be looking and wondering it makes accepting
hard for me but that is only the life we are all casually
drfting through frantically reaching out anchors searching
for the bottom of this sea of infinity coming up empty
what will be become of me

so we form this trinity you and me and everybody
we all look inside and see whats happening the universe singing
quietly as time drifts by lazily we can grab a moment of ecstacy
our love the fire burning bright against the darkness of reality
what else is there sweeter in life than the taste of your lips
touching me that wave of energy momentarily existing in eternity
it may never be but for the instant glimpsed with the blinking eye
but it is all i need

what i find facinating is that you have seen the worst of me bursts of me
and you still love all of me completely me seeing me
not what i could be should be but simply the me that you see when you look at me and you loving me is everything i could see myself ever needing
i love you all of you everything even the things you don’t think i see like you see deep inside of me
that is how we set each other free